I know that the feminists out there are going to hate me for this post but, at this very moment and time, I actually feel a bit sorry for men. I am currently looking for a picture for a feature, and have entered in the search terms “man embarrassed” with the intention of finding a red-faced man who is possibly covering his face with his hands. However the majority of the pictures depict a man and, although he is covering something with his hands, it certainly isn’t his face. Yes, 99% of all pictures I have seen have something to do with a man and his member – be it an exposed member, a too-small member, an uncooperative member, or a member who is failing to stand to attention.
This has got me thinking about the amount of ridicule and flak men get about their penises. I have to admit that I am often guilty of thinking that body issues and insecurities are problems known solely to the female gender. Here’s something that we women tend to forget: men have feelings too! Yes, I said it! Although sometimes we find ourselves thinking it, men are not merely relatively empty vessels composed only of testosterone, semen, and beer. And it must be tough being constantly defined by an unattractive piece of skin and muscle that bears a striking resemblance to a fleshy creature that didn’t quite evolve into its intended form.
So before you give your boyfriend’s Johnson an emasculating nickname, or refer to it as “cute” or “sweet”, think about my afore-mentioned point: men have feelings too! You may think it’s funny to rip off a man about his size or virility, but then don’t get upset when he points out that when you lie on your back your boobs look a lot like two fried eggs. Although we can follow a strict diet and partake in daily exercise, the sad fact of the matter is that we can only control our bodies up to a point. I have come to terms that, no matter how much I try or how much hormone-pumped chicken I eat, my boobs will never get any bigger. But that doesn’t mean that I like it when people mock me or make jokes about them. And, my dear readers, the same goes for men. Because they have feelings too.